Periodically someone emails me asking for my advice about a new romantic relationship. If you are thinking about a new relationship I have a few suggestions that will help you. First of all if I were contemplating a long-term relationship with someone and it looked like a viable prospect I would order the email compatibility reading from Mary.

The second point I would make is that in the beginning, relationships are driven by emotions which cause biochemical reactions in the body that can cloud logic and be addictive. It is difficult to be objective when you form an emotional bond with someone.

My third point is that a relationship should have an ease and flow to it. If you find yourself struggling to rationalize any major areas of the relationship, those areas will only get more irritating as time goes on. It is better to be alone than to be with the wrong person.

My advice is to get advice and take your time getting to know the person. Short term engagements have poor odds for forming a happy and lasting relationship.

Write down your areas of concern. This is really helpful because that way you will have them in front of you in black and white so you can look at the points on a regular basis and it will help you to be more objective about matters that are largely subjective.

On a final note…. most people who think they have found a soul mate have actually found a karma mate. By that I mean they attract someone who in some way reflects their own issues and conflicts. In some cases, the electricity that is felt early in a relationship may be the recognition of a past-life partner or friend which does not necessarily mean you are intended or supposed to be married to them in your current life. On the other hand, some electricity may be nothing more than a surge of hormones triggered by patterns from childhood.

A really good book to help you understand yourself and how you select a mate is the book “Getting the Love You Want” by Harville Hendrix.

There is a lot to think about when it comes to a relationship and since it can last a lifetime and affect every aspect of your life it is well worth careful consideration.